HAIL DUBYUS!

An Illustrated Guide to Mendacity and Folly in the Imperium Americanum

IO! SATURNALIA! The Holiday Designed to Offend … EVERYBODY!

And A Happy New Year!

And A Happy New Year!

Well, folks, it’s Saturnalia time again. I started wishing people a Sated Saturnalia when everyone and their brother started getting offended by one holiday or another. You can’t say Merry Christmas or the Jews will be upset, you can’t say Happy Hanukkah or the Muslims will get upset, Black Americans want you to recognize Kwanza, Wiccans want you to recognize Yule, and atheists get mad if you wish them ANYTHING. Therefore, I resurrected Saturnalia, the Roman holiday celebrating the overturning of the established order of things–to be celebrated in the worst taste possible. This year it is appropriate, since the Masters of the Universe have had their collective asses handed to them and the Republican cabal has finally been turned out of the government. During Saturnalia, the slaves took the places of the masters–and we have our first President from the race that was brought to this land as slaves. Saturnalia was a time of feasting and license. All the mores were overturned and all the prigs of the Roman world were duly horrified. It was the favorite holiday of the year.
By the way, Io is pronounced YO! People who insist it is pronounced EE-oh have no imagination 🙂
And at this time of the rolling year, it is meet that we should overturn the old in favor of the new. Little did I realize five and one-half years ago that I should still be drawing HAIL DUBYUS! today. Fred and Bert Squirrel joined the team on September 20, 2003, bringing with them their occasional drop-in friends Priss and Randy. I thought sure that our modern Commodus would be turned out after four years, but I reckoned without the Fates. But finally we will no longer be be guided by Capt. Wrong-Way Peachfuzz…and suddenly, the name of this cartoon dedicated to his imperial rectalness, HAIL DUBYUS! is obsolete.
Well, all good things must come to an end 🙂
Nonetheless, SOMEthing is still needed, as we will be dealing with our dubious (Dubious–Dubyus, get it?) legacy for some time to come. Although Mr. Obama has promised change, something tells me he’s going to need a jolt from an electric cattle prod every once in a while when the mainstream media yell too loudly that we’re a center-right country and anything but staying the course (not doing anything) is too radical. Sadly, HAIL DUBYUS ran into some hard times when someone at HOOmonGLEous Search Engine decided to marginalize it by eliminating nearly all of its cartoons from its database. Despite my efforts, to this day only a handful of my 700+ cartoons remain in its Image Search engines where 2-1/2 years ago there were over 400. So this may be seen as an opportunity to kill two birds with one stone.
Therefore we are pleased to announce the creation of a NEW WEBSITE:
INTRAVENOUS CAFFEINE!  http://www.ivcaffeine.com/
Intravenous Caffeine will have its inaugural issue on–Inauguration Day, January 20, 2009. It will offer more cultural and social commentary as well as political…or just be goofy as the fit moves me. Fred and Bert will be joining me there, as well as Mr. Dymme, who seems to have been showing up with greater and greater regularity for a while.
And so, my friends, I bid you adieu–but only to invite you on a new adventure in the battle against idiocy. Now let the cry be heard:
IO! SATURNALIA!
See you next year …

And to our Christian friends, Happy Hanukkah!

Happy Hanukkah from the White House...

Happy Hanukkah from the White House...

You know, sometimes, during the past eight years, I’ve thought that president Bush was evil. Sometimes, insane. Sometimes a tool of big business, and sometimes, a weirdo. But his latest Hanukkah Greetings tells me what the truth is. For the past eight years, we’ve had Frank Drebin as our president.

You remember Frank Drebin, the cop Leslie Nielson played in Police Squad (in Color)? That’s our Mr. Bush. People said they voted for him because he’d be a great guy to sit down and have a beer with. Well, just think about it. They elected a guy you’d be afraid to lend your lawnmover to because you think he might hurt himself with it–oh yes, it’s possible, just try to clear the blades while the ignition is still on. Worse than that, he’d probably hurt you along with it…and probably run over half a dozen squirrels to boot.
Gawker has a copy of the actual card: White House War on Hanukkah! [Culture Wars]